Despatches from a mother who started late (and is running to catch up)

Are older dads better fathers?

Entertaining piece here from a man who has just become a dad again - aged 54. One in ten babies is now born to a dad over 40 in the UK - and one in a hundred to a father over 50. So it's not just us 'older' mums whose numbers are on the increase. The writer, John Preston, is less apologetic about his status than many 'older' new mums, perhaps because society views older dads with more tolerance than it does mums.

Preston even suggests that older dads might make better parents than younger men. He cites research suggesting that older guys are less likely to do a runner on their family, more likely to 'help' with the housework (as if it's a woman's natural responsibility to work, look after the house and care for the children; and the man is doing her a favour by loading the dishwasher). He also suggests the wrinkly dads are more confident, affectionate, mature and responsible. Older dads are also apparently less driven by something called 'provider fever' - perhaps because they've made their moolah and so can relax.

But he is also honest enough to wonder whether younger men would suffer from what he calls "the exhaustion factor; the way in which my fuse has shrunk to the size of a gnat's tail, prompting me to froth up in helpless hysteria if anyone so much as dares to hoot their horn at me."  I was glad he mentioned that. It struck quite a chord with how I've been feeling for a while now.

Posted 15 June 2008 17:17

Dads Older mother

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